so you want to be poly...

So you want to be poly, but you’re not sure where to start or how to begin.

First things first: start with your why!

Engaging in a journey where you begin to question societal norms around romantic and sexual relationships can be exhilarating, empowering and freeing. What is new can feel like novelty and if the journey is not started from a grounded place, we can easily be set up for disappointment and much more chaos than I doubt any of us wants.

People have so many different reasons for choosing a non-monogamous lifestyle. So long as yours doesn’t bring harm to yourself or others, embrace it! 

Some questions to consider: 

• Why is this important to me?

• What does this fulfill in my life? 

• What is appealing about this choice?

• If I did not engage with this lifestyle, would I feel fulfilled?

• How does this choice align with my values?

Being honest with yourself around these questions not only helps you create alignment with yourself, it will inevitably help create alignment with partners, as you will be able to speak and move from a truthful place. Brene Brown says ‘clear is kind’ and damn is that true, especially in a polyamorous context. Responsible polyamory does not create more confusion in the world. Don’t confuse yourself, don’t confuse your partners. Know what you want and if you’re not clear on that, communicate that too!

Remember, your growth is beautiful, even when scary. I work with lots of folks who are both ready for change and fearful of it at the same time. How human! If this is you, know I’d love to support you through your journey and the door is always open for free consultations.

In your corner,

stef